If work only counts when you’re at the office, why should you spend even a minute working while you’re out? Not that long ago, in an era when cell phones didn’t exist and you couldn’t reach out to other people at a moment’s notice, there was a clear separation between your work life and your…
It’s an inheritance, not the lottery. Making plans based on the assumption that you will receive money when a family member passes away is extremely tacky. Firstly, because that money is not yours. It was someone else who decided to leave it to you once they are gone. They are allowed to change their mind,…
President Trump promised a $5,000 “Trump Dividend” to every American adult should Republicans maintain control of both the House and the Senate after the midterm elections, which would likely cost over $1 trillion in total. What do you think? “Yes, bribery is crucial to American elections, but we mustn’t forget blackmail and extortion either.” Ezra…
It has been fun to watch a new generation of fans discover Penny Arcade. Stumbling upon 30 years of comic strips, shows, and podcasts must be pretty fun. They have their own Discord server and they asked Jerry and I to pick winners in a PA fan art contest they were holding last month. We…
Retroactive family charge There is a distinction between a gift and a debt. A gift produces an asymmetry. A genuine gift produces an asymmetry; you can’t immediately ‘give back’ or repay, and that’s part of what makes it genuine. It’s not something you’re expected to pay for. This father, although, inverted that mechanism by retroactively…
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‘I will take my business elsewhere’. Do so! Nobody cares. I hate entitled customers, but these are also able to be divided into categories. There are the ones whose entitlement makes them scream. Then the ones that start mistreating with heavy insults towards the poor employee. There are also the ones that refuse to leave,…
BALTIMORE—In a major breakthrough that sheds new light on the still largely unexplored region, leading fertility experts at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine announced Friday that they had discovered rare deep-ball sperm at the bottom of the testes. Images shared by the researchers revealed a vast menagerie of strange and otherworldly sperm that…
INDIANAPOLIS—Profusely apologizing for the unexpected and last-minute cancellation, singer-songwriter Phoebe Bridgers announced Monday that she was postponing her show at Gainbridge Fieldhouse after experiencing a twinge of happiness. “I hate to do this, but fans wouldn’t be able to experience The Lost Tour as intended if I performed in the state I am tonight,” said…
NEW YORK—Citing the fact that “cars are fast and everyone likes them” as justification for the new rule, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell announced Monday that one player on each team would now be permitted to drive a car during games. “Wouldn’t it be fun? We think it will be fun. A car can go much…